I doubt the same way I dream. Most of my doubts are short-lived, fuzzy, and I
forget them as soon as I "wake up." Sometimes my doubts are bizarre. They leave me with more questions than answers and I try my best
to put them aside and move on with the rest of my day. The worst doubts are
like nightmares that last long after the night is finished. They have some leverage and reasoning. They scare me and consume my thoughts, making it difficult to trust.
I've learned
to react to both doubts and dreams the same way: with prayer. I ask God to help me see clearly. I tell friends about what's going on
and get advice. Often, I over-think and end up wasting a day or a few days in worry and
confusion. Typically, prayer is just the thing I need to put me back on my feet in the morning.
I don't always understand why nightmares scare me, or why
doubts, so big and strange, invade. One thing I do know: both are
important. Some aren't nearly as important as others. Like that time I
doubted that the Redskins could beat the Steelers. Or that
time I dreamed I was a pink kitten named Fleur.
No, the important ones
shape you. I have doubted if I was really a Christian. That caused me to
explore my faith, the Bible, God's work in my life, and taught me to
seek godly advice and healthy friendships. I had a few nightmares last year
where all my friends forgot me and shut me out of their lives
completely. That caused me to appreciate the strength
and reliability of true friends.
The doubts and the dreams will keep coming, I don't doubt that, but we're not powerless. God wants us to go to Him with our doubts, place them in His hands, and then trust Him to take care of them and teach us what we need to know.
He will.
Will you trust Him?
