We introduced ourselves and she said abortion should be legal because of the many difficulties that people discover along the way in pregnancy. I agreed that there are many possible complications and difficulties involved in pregnancy. Rachel then cautiously voiced a belief that the unborn isn't human. She asked me what I thought about abortion.
Gently, I said, "Before I tell you what I think, can I ask you more questions?"
She happily agreed.
"You said you don't think the unborn is human. Do you mean that in a biological sense or a philosophical sense?"
She grinned. "I just came from a human development class, and I failed philosophy, so let's talk about biology!"
Carefully and respectfully, she and I went back and forth for a few minutes while I clarified what her position was. Through five questions, we discovered that she believes the unborn is just a mass of cells in the first two weeks of pregnancy. According to her professor, "you can technically get in there and find human DNA, but it's not a human yet." She acknowledged that, after three weeks of development, the heart and brain are communicating and therefore the unborn is a human at that stage.
This is where I transitioned us. "Rachel, you asked me what I think about abortion. I was taught that the most comprehensive view of valuing human life extends to all stages of development, even the stages I am not personally attracted to. The embryo from conception to three weeks does not seem relational to me, but I would rather treat it like a human and respect life all the way through development, even to old age. That includes the two week embryo, all these students here, and you."
She paused and stared at me for a moment. When she spoke, she said, "let me just say, that is the most sensible pro-life view I've ever heard. Every other time I've had this conversation, the pro-life person just screams at me, 'd*** you, liberal!'"
I expressed sadness at the way she had been treated in the past and thanked her for sharing her experience. She went on to say how nice it was to disagree in a free way with me. She had grown up in a liberal environment, I had a conservative upbringing, and we were looking for truth together.
Thinking back on this exchange, the passage in 1 Corinthians 13 has new context for me. Even if I could speak with the tongues of men and of angels, having the most knowledge and scientific facts at my disposal, if I do not love the person I'm talking to, it's more than worthless: it is that obnoxious sound that hurts and you wish would just stop. For Rachel, I was the first person she disagreed with who had let her express her opinion without attacking her. I hope I'm not the last.
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast;
It is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way;
it is not irritable or resentful;
it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never ends. As for prophecies, they will pass away; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away.
For we know in part and we prophesy in part,
but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.
When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I gave up childish ways.
For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.
So now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love."
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